Grad student living in terror

Dear Cary, I’m a grad student living in Philadelphia. I graduated from undergrad a year ago and went straight into grad school because it felt right. Nothing is wrong whatsoever with my pick of grad schools. I love the program, the professors are excellent, and the facilities charming and well kept. Thing is, I’m not used to being alone like this all the time. In undergrad I had tons of classmates. I had a few friends. There was always someone around to talk to. I was even in a long-distance, long-term relationship all the way through up until my senior year of college. We lived together for a while until we mutually agreed that things weren’t working out. After undergrad I moved in with my family short-term before I moved and attended grad school. There were always my siblings, parents and local friends to lean on when I felt crummy. I don’t even remember being the slightest bit afraid of anything. Now it’s completely different. I can’t stop thinking about everyone in my life and wishing they were near. When I have others around me I’m fine, but who am I when they leave? Even if I feel like I know who I am, what is this new reality of being by myself? What does it really mean to be “alone”?Continue Reading…

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Grad student living in terror


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